Just as I feared, it happened this morning-- a visit from Child Protective Services.
The morning began as it always does, our usual doings as we wake up and start the day. I was sitting in the living room nursing the baby and the girls were playing with their Barbies when Hubby came in and told me there was a guy here from Child Protective Services (CPS), here to see the baby, on a report from the doctor.
The pediatrician called the Department of Health on us, because we refused to take the baby to the hospital to be tested and because we didn't follow his orders of feeding the baby formula 7 times a day.
The worker from CPS and my husband and I sat down at the dining table and we began to talk. He asked us about the baby and we explained what happened at the doctor's office. I told how he turned his back on me when he knew I was deaf and the worker made a face and said that was rude. We said that we tried to explain the history of our other children and the doctor didn't want to listen and when he wanted to take the baby to the hospital for testing, he didn't say for what. I explained that I didn't feel comfortable with the pediatrician and that we were going to check out 3 other doctors here in town.
We also told the worker about the ob/gyn doctor that broke my water without my permission and he was shocked at what we said. Medicaid has been both a blessing and a curse. A blessing because we can relax a little knowing that should one of our children get hurt, they will be covered and we don't go into debt paying doctor bills. A curse because it seems to bring out the worst doctors or at least bring out the worst in doctors. I only get to pick doctors that accept medicaid and even then, it seems like they look at you like you are insignificant or are taking advantage of the system and getting free health care or welfare or anything. That's what it seems like to me.
While we were talking to the CPS worker, my eye started to see the mess in my home, the toys scattered here and there, the pile of papers on the countertop that seems to be the catch-all for all papers that enter through our doors. The crumbs on the table and floor from last nights' dinner, the dishes in the sink and on the counter that have not yet been washed... I apologized for the mess, trying to say that with a baby and 3 kids, well, kind of hard to keep up. He shook his head and said "You should see my house". I still can't help but think he might have said that but wrote something else in his file.
I started to cry a little and I was upset at what was going on. In my house, was a CPS worker, checking up on my baby. All the worse-case scenarios started running through my head. The worker assured us that there would probably be no more visits and this is the last we hear from him, provided we contact them after we make an appointment with another doctor and let them know how it went. He said he has seen far worse homes with babies left in the cribs and no care or attention to them. After talking with us for about 40 minutes, he left.
The husband and I are furious, upset, angry, frustrated, disappointed... I never imagined that there would be a CPS worker in my own home inquiring me about my own children. Now our names are in the system and on file and should anything ever pop up, a red flag will come up because some idiot doctor reported us to CPS for neglect. It's enough to make me want to pack up our stuff, sell the house and move to somewhere new and begin fresh.
It really makes my husband and I both angry when we take our jobs as parents seriously and do the best we can to provide for them, with what little we have, and then some idiot out there has to go and make things harder for us. I don't care if the CPS worker says "this will probably be the last time you hear from us", it doesn't matter, the fact is, we are now a name on their list of reported parents. My husband wonders about calling a lawyer to see what can be done, and all I can think is to go away from here.
Life is hard sometimes and it is made harder when meddling doctors call CPS on us. I now feel like I need to super clean my house and keep it that way at all times, in case there is another surprise visit from CPS. I don't need that hanging on my head. Excuse me while I go outside and scream my head off.