Friday, June 29, 2007

Take a Deep Breath and Hold It...

If you have ever wondered what skunk smells like, you have come to the right place! Last night, being such a cool night with a lovely breeze blowing through, we had all the windows open. I was on the Video Phone talking to one of my girlfriends and the girls were tucked away and sleeping. Then I smelled it. Faint, at first. A whiff of skunk wafting in through the windows. It was just a whiff and then it passed. I didn't pay it any mind. It was like driving on the highway at 60 mph and you pass a dead skunk on the side of the road; a whiff of skunk and then it's gone.

Then it came again, stronger. Have you ever vacuumed the carpet and got a string caught up in the rolling brush and then the brush gets caught and you get that burning rubber smell? It was sorta, kinda, a little bit like that, only STRONGER! With a dash of stink-bug mixed in. You know, that ugly black beetle that scurries around on the basement floor and then you smash it with the nearest handy item and it releases that stink. Ugh! Add in a sprinkle of burnt, and I do mean black, toast and I think you've got the idea what skunk smells like.

That smell got stronger and stronger and the poor eyes started watering. I told my friend there was a skunk outside and she told me she could smell it, too! That's how strong it was! The smell stayed and lingered like an unwelcome guest eating up all your food and then scrounging around in your pantry and digging out your secret stash of chocolate covered cherries. It spilled itself all over the couch and refused to leave, instead, falling asleep and bellowing out roars with every breath in and out. It marched into my nostrils and pulled on all my nose hairs and tied them into a hundred knots.

Hubby came home and said, "Must be a skunk out there." Really????? I couldn't tell.


We went to bed knowing the smell would fade away, riding away on the breeze, bothering some other poor soul's nose. How wrong we were! We woke to the smell of skunk. It's a lovely smell first thing in the morning-- a real eye-opener. Apparently the cat tangled with the skunk. Poor Lucy reeks of skunk. I made the mistake of petting her and no matter how many times I wash my hands, I can still smell skunk on my palms. Apparently they tangled right outside the office sliding door, so every time I come in to check the computer, read some blogs, I have to sit and mingle with the smell of skunk, like being introduced over and over to the same drunken cad who can't remember your name but remembers to give you a slobbery kiss as he leaves and you're left with a dripping wet cheek and no towel to wipe it off.

If there was a 'scratch and sniff' option, you'd do well not to scratch and sniff. You'd back away and run quickly in the opposite direction. In fact, you wouldn't even need to scratch... it's burning through. I can't take it anymore. I'm going to douse myself in my favorite perfume and close the office door. I'll be buying a couple quarts of tomato juice tomorrow. Imagine how poor Lucy must feel...

8 comments:

Dana said...

Oh, I feel for you! I have had my share of skunk. Once, when I was a teenager, we had a skunk spray the outside unit of the air conditioner so everytime it kicked on we had a nice aromatic cooling of the entire house. Then, a couple of years ago, my inside dog got sprayed in the backyard. Hubs let her in the house before he realized she was stinky. For a couple of years afterwards, he could call her stinky (in a loving voice of course) and she would get extremely embarassed and humble.

Good luck getting rid of that!

jenny said...

Dana-- Oh! on the air conditioner?? Poor you! We think the skunk lives in the mess of azalea bushes in the front yard somewhere cuz it sort of reeks constantly over there. But it isnt close to the house so we leave it alone. I guess Skunk was on an adventure last night! This is the 2nd time Lucy tangled with a skunk so I guess she didnt learn her lesson the first time.

Thanks for coming back! And I STILL cant figure out how to swipe that badge....

LaRonda said...

Ah-ha-ha-ha! You are just such a good writer! Your words drip like honey from a worn wooden spoon held 12 inches high, which hits the fragrant, warm, oven-fresh biscuit right in the middle! You're always right on the mark! ;)

Hopefully the thought of the smell of a fresh, warm biscuit with honey will cover up the parfume de skunk!)

~ LaRonda

Krissie said...

You just have to get that "scratch'n'sniff" option somehow. lol I can tell you won't rest till you do, Weird Cat Lady. Or shall I change it to Weird Skunk Lady now? Let's see if the smell will stick to your palms...

DJ Kirkby said...

SKUNK! Urrrrghhh! Never ever will I forget that smell. you know what their redeeming feature is? They are soo darn cute when they are little kittens, I remember seeing a family of them, the babies hopping along behind their parents...

Omega Mum said...

You just don't realise these things. Can you buy anti-skunk spray? And was it you that had the tick problem because I want to tell you that last week I bought a tick-unscrewer and twisted out the tick from cat's neck, retrieved it alive and then squashed it. I feel soooo good. Cat seemed pretty pleased, too.

jenny said...

Laronda-- Oh mmmm, that made me hungry for honey!! That sure did the trick!! Thank you!!

Krissie-- I have made it my top priority to somehow get a 'scratch and sniff' option installed over the internet!! LOL Weird Skunk Lady works for me!

Dj-- Absolutely darn freakin' cute!!! One night before it got dark, I saw what I thought was one of the stray cats eating, but after a closer look, it was a skunk! Awwwww! I froze and hoped it wouldnt notice and a let out a spray in my vincinity. It never noticed me, too busy chomping away on cat food. I quickly went back in the house and watch from the safety of my window. Thanks for coming back!!

Omega-- Yes, that was me with my tick story.. I have discovered a new way to remove ticks-- works on kids but hard to make a cat sit still for 20 to 30 seconds. Put a big dab of liquid soap on a cotton ball and place it over the tick, being sure to smother it with the soap. After about 20 seconds, the tick will wiggle out and release it's grip and then it will be stuck in the blob of soap and you can destroy said tick.

I have found several more ticks since my tick post, so I am getting better at removing them, but still no less squeamish about the nasty things!

No anti-skunk spray that I know of. Tomato juice does the trick! Thanks for coming by!

GunPowderandLead said...

It is the middle of the night...4am to be exact. I have been searching the web for the last hour or so, and finally came upon this blog. I awoke to the smell of burnt rubber, yes much like the smell your vacuum makes when a carpet string gets caught in it. How do I get rid of the smell? A skunk must have got under our house and sprayed. It is in the air. Will the smell go away on it's own, and if so, how long will that take? Or must we do more?
Help!